Aidan’s return towards the end of the third season of Sex and the City delighted many fans. Sure, Carrie might have cheated on him, broken her heart, and moved on, Of course, Carrie might have betrayed him, broken her heart, and moved on, but as soon as we saw Steve’s cute weird conversations outside his bar, we had to back them up.
Throughout their rekindled relationship, Aidan’s marriage proposal, and even his unexpected return in Sex and the City 2, many of us secretly hoped that Carrie would give up on Big. We don’t know who was more heartbroken when the most loved couple didn’t get together; Aidan, Mr. Anti-Big ones?
Every time we watch it, we still get upset that Carrie left Aidan in the middle of it by opting for Big. Aside from Carrie’s somewhat troubled taste, Aidan was the most perfect man of all the men the Sex and the City characters have dated. Aidan brought the emotional depth Big had always lacked. But in the end, it was just too good for Carrie.
That’s why we were so surprised to see that a sweet-hearted aged version who loves furniture making and farm life really meets Carrie in the second season of And Just Like That. I mean, we know on-screen divorcees have a hard time forgetting their ex, but we thought Aidan would realize it was Carrie who left him and move on.
So what things need to change between Carrie and Aidan for their relationship to work out this time?
Carrie needs to learn to prioritize someone other than herself
During the couple’s fourth-season breakup, Carrie yells, “I’m yours, no one else.” She I think what she actually meant was “There is no one else for the moment”, she. She repeatedly put her feelings for Big before Aidan, she. As if cheating wasn’t bad enough, he continued to include her in their relationship even when they got back together. Aidan was quite right in asking Carrie to cut her ex out of her life. Sure, we could see Carrie’s frustration, but her regular phone calls and Big’s invitation to come to Aidan’s cabin in season four definitely crossed the line.
Going back to the beginning of Carrie and Aidan’s relationship, we can say that she mostly takes care of herself. A sweet relationship that turned sour over time, there were multiple red flags when we looked at the show for the second time. From the beginning, we can see Carrie struggling with commitment. Remember the moment when Aidan ran away from meeting his parents or bonding with his dog? Then the cheating happened, and when they got back together, it didn’t completely fix his behavior. She refused to even wear her engagement ring on her finger. Although his feelings for her grew for the second time; He’s back in the habit of thinking only about what’s best for him and not taking his feelings seriously.
Of course, your relationship shouldn’t just revolve around another person, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t consider the other person’s feelings. It is necessary to think about how best to convey your feelings and reasons and to be honest with your partner. If Carrie had told Aidan that wearing her engagement ring as a necklace meant she wasn’t ready to commit; would have saved the couple a lot of heartbreak.
Lesson to be learned from all this; If you describe yourself as “Carrie,” her treatment of Aidan is not something to emulate in your own love life. Instead, be honest with your partner and if you don’t like him madly at the beginning (i.e. on your first date attempt), maybe it’s time to move on.
It’s time to realize that their relationship is not an escape
Carrie tells her friends about her endless desire to reconnect with Aidan; When she reviewed her past with Aidan, little mention was made of their kiss in Abu Dhabi in the movie Sex and the City 2. If you want to refresh your memory: While Carrie was married to the seemingly estranged Big, she saw Aidan at an arcade on vacation and the two decided to meet for dinner. Despite her friends warning her not to play with fire, Carrie kissed Aidan at a get-together that was supposed to be a dinner between friends. Feeling confused and helpless, the duo decided the kiss was a mistake and felt guilty, and Carrie told Big what had happened.
Now you may be wondering why we brought this up, but we believe this is an important moment as it refers to their reconnection in the spinoff. They had last seen each other years ago in another country, which meant that this negative interaction was worlds away, and it may not have made sense to worry about it.
And during their little Valentine’s date, they did a pretty good job (until they got to Carrie’s apartment; yes, the one where Aidan rearranged the bed she slept with Big in season three). Unable to express and confront what that apartment means to them, the duo continue their love in NYC’s luxury hotels, and when it gets too expensive, Carrie; begging them to spend a few nights in their flat.
In an episode of And Just Like That, after meeting Aidan’s children in Virginia, Carrie decides to sell the flat. Now they seem to realize that their current relationship is no escape from the past.
If getting back together with your ex is the right path, you should first address what went wrong and why. Think about how the relationship can be lived out realistically (eg, will Aidan have to travel to see it?) and figure out how it will work out. Similarly, discuss what needs to be different for the relationship to go all the way this time. Because if nothing changes, you will go back to the same old habits and you may risk breaking each other’s hearts.
Aidan needs to learn to trust himself more
Of course, some of the Sex and the City fans like to feature Aidan as the perfect guy. But we must not forget that he is often portrayed as a victim. For example; In season 4, episode 7, Miranda, who was naked after a shower, asked Carrie for help. However, Carrie sent Aidan to look after Miranda. Carrie had a meeting that coincided with Miranda’s neck injury, but when had Carrie ever really worried about making the best impression in any previous episode? This episode was an example of Carrie prioritizing her own plans and feelings and only paying attention to Aidan when she felt like she needed him.
But let’s be clear; Aidan is not innocent either. From the very beginning, she knew that Carrie had another man on her mind and in her heart, and she knew that she felt that he was more important than her. And even as Big continued to call Carrie after being out of their relationship, Aidan’s concerns were nonetheless ignored. Somehow, Carrie became Aidan’s Big. He always put Big above Aidan, just as Carrie puts Big’s interests and others above him. And now when they’re together, we wonder; Will Aidan act differently if Carrie displays similar moves? Or will he still continue to admit his bad behavior to her?
Throughout their first relationship, Aidan lived with the consequences of allowing himself to be put in second place. This time, we hope he realizes his own worth and steps back if Carrie still can’t connect completely to him. A relationship where one partner always feels like a second choice will not be a happy relationship.
Of course it’s natural to do what you want, but if someone constantly reveals that they are not in your best interests, you cannot stay in such a relationship. Because you deserve more (and so does Aidan). A partner who cares about you will do their best to lift you up and put you first so as not to repeat their reckless behavior.
On their resuming relationship
Their histories are quite complex. The two obviously don’t want to talk about their previous relationship because this relationship has been painful, but to move forward, Carrie needs to be nicer to Aidan, and Aidan also needs to communicate their disagreement. One of her biggest hurdles (whoooo, Big) is definitely out of the picture now, and Carrie reflects on her past and wonders if Big was a mistake. That’s why she and Aidan might have a chance to fight for their relationship. However, if they really want their relationship to work out this time, old habits will have to be let go, albeit hard. Maybe we are even starting to expect a positive outcome for them again?